The Only 5 Steps You Need to Follow to Achieve A Goal

Oh hi!

I'm in the throes of misery at my job. I mean, I am so very very thankful to have gainful employment and such, but.... the situation I am in is mentally unhealthy.  And while I was doing the dishes at home the other night, I realized that I have a habit of allowing myself to languish at companies the same way I let myself languish in relationships.  It's not a fit, and I know it's not a fit, but I'm so afraid of letting go of everything I know and enduring CHANGE, that I find comfort in the reliability of my current misery over the risk of seeking happiness and falling flat on my face.

I feel like life has been teaching me some tough lessons over the past few years, and while they present in completely different ways, I'm finding I'm having to learn the same lesson over and over.  A bad relationship, a bad injury, and now an unsafe working situation... at what point will I realize that only I can change my attitude and circumstances, and that being proactive about my life is the only way to truly live?

So as I stood at the sink, I tried to think of ways I've remedied my bad situations in the past.  What about the times I was unhappy about something and decided to take my own fate into my own hands and be proactive about changing my circumstances?  What about the times I had a goal, even; what did I find I needed in order to employ a plan to achieve whatever it was I was after?

I thought about how I tackled college;  I thought about how I fought from remedial math all the way up to advanced calculus.  I thought about how I set my eyes on making my collegiate soccer team after having NO experience playing on my high school team, and how I ended up becoming a starter in the end.  And I thought about going from a completely backwards Standard American Diet and shitty workout ethic to learning and achieving everything I have in terms of health and fitness in the past couple years.

What did these instances have in common?

I thought about it for a couple days.  And then I wrote these notes.

How Exactly To Achieve Any Goal

1) The Basics: Know what your goal is, and fully define it.

You need to have a general idea of what the finish line is.  For some, it is an actual finish line; something finite, quantifiable. "I want to cross the finish line of a half marathon".  "I want to lose 100 lbs."  "I want to be the Senior Vice President of my division at work."  "I want to get a 95% or better on my exam."

But some goals begin as feelings:  "I want to feel the rush of victory at something".  "I just want to feel good about how I look."  "I want to be proud of what I do for work; I want to feel like I am contributing to society."  "I want to prove to myself that I'm smarter than society makes me feel I am."  Feelings are good, but you need to let them guide you to something quantifiable.  Because without a finite end, there is no way to make a plan, judge your progress, or really know when you have arrived.

2) Understand the cost.

Last weekend I went and bought $400 worth of power tools because I wanted to build my own up-raised planters for my balcony.  I wanted to give myself a healthy hobby, to put my hands to use and therapeutically take my mind off of work.  Plus I'm crafty as fuck.  I had the money saved up, and so I spent it.

The problem is that when I had my ONE gym day-off last night -- and my only free time that isn't taken up by work, training, necessary socializing, volleyball, eating, sleeping or bathing -- I realized I didn't want to spend that time making a loud chaotic mess on a project that really required all of my focus and attention, which I just wasn't willing to give.  Rest, peace, and quiet on Wednesday afternoons/evenings is just too precious for me to spend it woodworking like an uninformed lunatic.

Think through the costs and sacrifices -- as many as you can foresee, at least -- BEFORE you start your goal.  Understanding the difficulties before you start will help you keep your eyes focused on your goal when you are enduring the difficulties.  It also might help you redefine your dream, or even stop you from chasing a something you might not actually even want (see Step 5).

3) Make a map.

No matter how little you know about what you are undertaking, and how crazy some of the steps might seem, write on a piece of paper what your goal is, and at least 5 steps that get you from where you are to where you want them to be.  Make sure you understand the fine line that distinguishes steps that push you to dream big, and those that are just flat out unrealistic and may set you up for failure.  Say you are 4 feet tall and your goal is to scale a 20-ft vertical wall.  It would be unrealistic to say that you are just gonna start aimlessly jumping and maybe miraculously reach the top somehow.  But some goals require a little bit of dreaming and creative problem solving.  Perhaps you have a length of rope and a tall tree next to the wall.  Sure, you've never climbed a 20-ft tree, nor had to climb a rope to even reach the first branch you could use to climb toward the wall's top; but is it too unrealistic to set your mind to the task, practice, take it bit by bit, and utilize the tree to help you achieve your goal?? No.

If your goal was to lose 100lbs, you may set small goals:  1) Hire a nutritionist to create a meal plan, and promise to stick to it for 1 week.  And then 1 month.  And then 2 months.  2) Commit to 15 minutes of outdoor walking for a couple weeks.  Then 30 mins.  Then jogging.  Then set a goal to run a 5k.... etc.  All of these small goals lead toward the final end point and give you something manageable to work toward in the face of a goal that might seem completely impossible on the surface.

4) Be willing to accept setbacks, detours and humility, BEFORE you start your journey. (And commit to learning how to use these all to your advantage.)

Oh.  You think you aren't going to fail several times along the way? You aren't going to have some set-
backs?  You aren't going to be forced to change your ENTIRE map because something isn't working according to your plan?  If that is your attitude, then you've already failed.  Not only will the frustration of inevitable trials alone make you believe your goal is not possible, but even if you DO miraculously manage to achieve your goal without falling on your face even once, then you've missed out on an amazing experience of learning just how adaptive and creative a human being can be when they have an iron will and eyes set on a mountain of a goal.  Those set backs, failures and detours could be anywhere from annoying to devastating, but what you learn from overcoming them is knowledge you will NEVER learn in any other way.  It's where wisdom and perspective come from, not to mention it improves your problem-solving skills, gives you a good story to share in the future, and reinforces just how important your goal is to you.  One day you will look back the most fondly on your setbacks, because the pride you feel for overcoming them will swell for all eternity afterwards.

Every goal worth fighting for will be one that likely provokes a feeling of defeat in you before a feeling of success. If you feel defeated, then you're actually probably doing it right.  Keep thinking, keep trouble-shooting, put your head down, and push through the headwinds; keep willing one foot in front of the other.

5) The Real Kicker: Want your goal bad enough to actually achieve it.

This is the one kicker, the one step where so long as you have this one down, you actually could get away with skipping all the previously aforementioned steps:  You have to actually want your goal bad enough to achieve it.

It sounds silly; how can you even have a goal -- a dream -- without first wanting it?

It's not that we don't want our goals; I would love to quit my job and walk across America. It's a dream of mine to build my house by hand in the countryside.  And I'd love to study for the MCAT, go to medical school and become a trauma surgeon.  The problem is that I don't want those things bad enough to commit to the journey -- or rather, all the inherent trials, tribulations and sacrifices.  All too often we hear people say how badly they want 6-pack abs.  Gyms across the world are packed on January 1 with people who have big goals, plenty of motivation, and a wealth of good intention.  The problem is that the second things become difficult, or uncomfortable, or scary, or REAL........ people back down.  They make excuses, or allow themselves to believe they "can't do it", without even trying.  And some people would rather remain in the consistent discomfort of staying complacent in their current misery, then venturing out and believing in the triumph that follows a determined heart; and enduring the struggles before enjoying the spoils.

Like what Dr. Eric Thomas said, "As long as you want to succeed as bad as you want to breathe, then you will be successful."

If you know what your goal is, if you've plotted out the steps to achieve it, visualized the difficulties, and committed to pushing through them, and if you really actually WANT your goal -- like, bad enough that you'd give anything to have that end result -- then you can't fail. Remember that taste of blood in your mouth.  Write down all the reasons you want the goal, all of those feelings you have that are driving you to embark on this journey, no matter how vague or specific they are.  Memorialize the beginning.  Take progress photos or capture real, true video confessionals of where you are now or what you want and why.  Because there WILL come a time when the struggles will make the feelings go away, and you don't want to lose focus on why you are you doing what you are doing.  No matter how desperately you want a dream, you will usually always be pushed to a point where you forget how bad you want it.  Leave yourself tokens to remember what it tasted like to have your teeth sunk into your dream, and it will carry you through the times that your heart, body and/or soul will fail you on.

That is how you achieve a goal.

~Meg

Week 9: How Bad Do You Want It?

"When you want  to succeed as bad as you want to breathe, then you will be successful"
-Eric Thomas

In week nine, I realized something very important:  I am going to succeed.  I have this one dream, and sometimes it seems so far-fetched given the limitations my back problem poses, but it doesn't matter; I'm going to achieve every single one of my goals.  It might take me longer than 6 months.  It might take me longer than 6 years.  But one day, I will be on this blog posting about how NOTHING is impossible if you want it bad enough to do whatever it takes.

Dr. Eric Thomas's words have spoken to me for 2 years now.  His speech (some of which is posted in the video at the end of  this blog) propelled me through the tough times in 2012 when I first starting chasing after this crazy dream, and they have now taken my hand once again.  I spent all of 2013 sitting on the sidelines, stuck on bed rest, not even being able to walk without pain.  Patience was no option when all I felt, all day long, was that bloodlust to get back in the gym and keep working toward my goal.  Fate had a different path in mind for me.

There's this funny thing about dreams -- the ones for which we are intoxicatingly fervent -- they never let us go.  They haunt us until we haunt them.  For some of us, if we're lucky, we have a vision that provokes the same feelings in us as a desperate, unrequited love - a love we can't bear to live without, a love that chokes us in our sleep and occupies every thought, every moment, and every action we make in life.  

For me, building my physique is something so much more than the superficial.  It is so much more than a physical state of being.  It even transcends being an emotional, spiritual or psychological transformation; it is the complete intermixing of each of these qualities of being human, and then more.  

Just last week, GORGO posted this photo on their Facebook Page.

To some, it may appear just a typical motivational meme.  To me, it summed up in one sentence the very essence behind this drive I have within to achieve my goal. When I first started seriously training in 2012, it WAS only just about looking good.  In fact, the very words out of my own mouth in my first blog post on this site were, "Why doesn't my body look like the elite athlete I feel like I work so hard for it to be!?"  It was always about outward appearances.  It was always about slaving away at the gym to have the results -- never about the process.  Like a desk jockey who throws away 9 hours of their day every weekday just to have a paycheck in the end -- and not actually enjoying their craft at all.  But it didn't matter; all I wanted was the body to show for it.

That is, until I tasted the first moment of what it felt like to be strong.  That first moment I looked in the mirror and saw with my eyes the difference.  That moment when I realized all the time I spent researching, constructing routines, following the advice of the experts, cleaning up my diet and REFUSING to make excuses or fall to temptations.  That time I felt my lats flex for the first time, and felt over come with empowerment.  I felt.... invincible.  Capable.  I felt like I had somehow righted all of the wrongs from my past by proving to myself that I could set my mind to a goal and accomplish it on my own.  I felt an overwhelming pride of ownership in who and what I was, and what I had earned.  There is just this ethereal essence of simply existing that can be felt (almost like a high, I would imagine) when you put absolutely everything you have into a task -- more than just blood sweat and tears, but also your heart, your soul, and everything you ever believed about your limitations (and then some!) -- and then to see it finally translate onto your canvas.  It was like breathing fresh air for the first time.  It was the most awake, most alive, I had ever felt.

It was a challenge, and it was exciting, and it was beautiful.  It was an art and a form of expression; it touched upon every element of what I need as a human to live a fulfilling life.

So when all of it was taken away from me so suddenly when I injured my back, it was complete ruin.  I had to ask myself some incredibly difficult questions in the midst of my long recovery, and went through some dark times I'd care never to repeat.

But, here we are. Things will never be as they once were for me, but not a single day passed during my recovery that I ever faltered and my passion for this dream ever faded.  It was always there, waiting for me.  I don't know how long it will take, but I will absolutely be damned if I don't achieve my goal.

The question is, what are my goals?  So far, its just a number: 15%.  That is what I want to get my body fat down to, and to build natural lean muscle.  Whether I actually choose to compete one day is a different story; its more just a personal thing.  I'd also like to be able to run the Big Sur half marathon, and finally win my damn A and AA ratings in volleyball.

Really, I just want to prove to myself that I won't let the circumstances if life snuff me out. Not yet, at least.

Week Nine was solid.  I ramped up my workouts -- particularly my cardio, to increase my caloric burn and help with the leaning out phase.  I did a LOT of stretches for my back each day, and it helped tremendously.  I continued with my weight training but took extra precaution on legs day.  I stuck to my diet, and acknowledge I will need to be on top of my diet more on the weekends.  Week 10 will be about continued vigor in cardio, an increase in weights, the addition of a new circuit training day, and clamping down more on my diet. 

"Pain is temporary. It may last for a minute, or an hour, or a day -- or even a year.  But eventually, it WILL subside. And something else will take its place.  The most important thing is this: To be able to, at any moment, sacrifice what you are, for what you will become."
--Eric Thomas

Clean Eating on the Cheap: Variety may be the spice of life, but let's be real… that sh*t needs to be on SALE.

One thing I've always prided myself on is finding a good deal.  Now, I'm no thrift store shopper or coupon queen (not to say that I have anything against that, because I don't; it's just not the lengths I've ever gone with my bargain-hunting habits), but being raised the way I was, I learned early on that I needed to be able to make a penny stretch to the size of a dollar.  

I got my first "real-life" job serving ice cream at Haagen-Dazs just after my 15th birthday.  Since I was under the legal working age, my employer was able to take advantage of a labor loop-hole and charge me a full dollar less than minimum wage per hour. Still, every summer I would work my butt off because that would be the only money at my disposal to pay for my new school clothes and any other discretionary items outside of food and shelter that I would want.  

It was tough but it certainly taught me the value of a dollar, along with some other incredibly useful budgeting lessons that helped me survive college.  When it came to being a university student, not only was I now on my own to buy my clothing and such, but I now had to pay for books, tuition, food, and all my other bills as well!  I was a full-time student working part-time jobs to cover full-time adult expenses.  Therefore, naturally, one of the easiest things to control as far as expenses were concerned was the grocery bill.

Food is a funny thing, because most items really don't cost all that much.  $2.49 here, $1.99 there.  But boy, does it add up.  I think we all can agree that the difference between buying a regular apple for $0.69 and an organic one for $1.19 is rather trivial (is $0.50 really all that much???).  But if you eat one a day for a full month, we're talking about a difference of almost $16 a month. And that's just for apples! Add in all the other monies you would save by making cheaper food selections, and we're looking at a sum of money that could cover a utility bill, a credit card payment, or the cost of necessary monthly medications.  Simply put? Savings are savings.  And when money is an issue, opting out of organics is a non-issue.

Well, we can now fast forward several years to my post-collegiate life.  School loans are paid off, car is almost paid off, retirement account is [slowly] growing, and I have a respectably-paying job that allows me to live a decent middle class life.  I'm not buying a house anytime soon, but I certainly am not wanting for food and shelter.  Even still, limited resources are limited resources, and I seemed to have carried my same budget-conscious habits toward food into my adult life.  I wouldn't eat garbage food; I mean, I did make sure I got my fruits and veggies and proteins.  But I certainly would forgo buying avocados and nuts in favor of cheaper snacks like crackers or Easy Mac (Yes, I said Easy Mac... oh, the shame!)  So, one of the rudest awakenings I got when I undertook this clean-eating adventure was the massive shift in discretionary income toward my new food expense each month.  That was such a fat pill to swallow that I about needed the Heimlich each time I got to the front of the register counter. 

But you see, it wasn't that I couldn't afford "higher quality foods"; it was more the principle of the matter.  It was knowing that for the last 10 years I was able to feed myself 3 decent meals and 3 snacks a day, 7 days a week, for $65 or less...... but now my grocery bill has doubled!?!  Where is the logic in knowing that for organic produce -- with no added chemicals or labor to apply said chemicals, just throw a seed into the earth and let mother nature do the dirty work -- the price seemingly doubles?  It makes no sense!  But of course, the logic is there.  Chemicals off-set the cost of losing plants to bugs and blights, yada yada yada, I get it.  But what I don't like, is the notion that the second money becomes an obstacle, people take the path of least resistance by buying crap food instead of seeking ways around it.  And I can say that, because I used to be one of those people!  But now that diet has become something of importance to my life, I've felt the need to seek out methods of mitigating the colossal crush of rising food commodity prices and the added expense of eating clean and organic options.

I've done a lot of research on tips and techniques as well as trying out my own ideas.  This in no way is an exhaustive list, but it's certainly a start at creating a handbook of sorts for people of all ages and all degrees of income to find solutions that work for them in terms of increasing the quality of their diet while keeping costs static (or potentially at a minimum).

1.  WATER

It goes without saying that an instantaneous (and free!) way of reducing cost and increasing diet quality is to abandon all fluids besides water.  Juice, coffee, soy milk, almond milk, regular milk, soda, booze, coconut water, and even tea... none are necessary.  So when it comes to you being able to afford Ezekiel Bread over that cheap loaf of white bread devoid of all nutrition and chock-full of empty calories, ditch the decaf and opt for a glass of water instead.  And further, STOP buying bottled water.  It's the same stuff as tap!  Added minerals to alter the flavor doesn't make bottled water "cleaner" than tap.  Both are filtered, both are fluoridated, and both are perfectly safe to consume.  If you can, buy a Brita pitcher or another knock-off; one $7 filter can purify 40 gallons on water.  If you can't stomach the taste of water, buy a lime at the grocery store; it's usually less than 20-cents a fruit, can produce 4 water-flavoring wedges, it alkalizes your gut upon consumption, flavors your water, and adds a boost of natural vitamin C to boot.

2.  KNOW WHEN TO BUY ORGANIC PRODUCE, AND WHEN NOT TO

Not everything "needs" to be organic.  While it is ideal to eliminate all exposure to potentially harmful chemicals and pesticides that riddle our produce, sometimes that is not an option.  So pick and choose your own battles.  The rule of thumb is to definitely buy organic produce for which the peel is thin, or where you eat the peel.  Examples of produce you'll want to buy organic:  Apples, peaches, pears, berries, cucumber, zucchini, celery.  Examples of when you can buy regular:  Bananas, oranges/lemons/limes (assuming you don't consume the zest or peel), pineapple, spaghetti squash, cantaloupe, avocado, corn.

The 2012 list of the "Dirty Dozen" was just released by the Environmental Working Group recently which details the current top 12 "dirtiest" fruits and vegetables contaminated by pesticides and chemicals, as well as a list of the top 15 "cleanest" produce items.  EWS recommends that foods on the Dirty Dozen list should absolutely be purchased organic, whereas the "Clean 15" can be of the "regular" (non-organic) variety.

Lastly, it goes without saying that shopping at Farmer's Markets tend to always yield better deals than grocery stores since you're cutting out the "middle man".  There are no grocery store worker salaries, property rents, insurance and utility bills and all other expenses associated with operating a grocery store that you need to worry about paying for via the overhead applied to the cost of your food.  Buy straight from the farmer and you will naturally reduce those expenses.

3.  BETTER THAN BUYING:  GROW YOUR OWN!
Since I was young, I've had a fascination with life (which is ironic, considering as how I NEVER want children).  But cultivating plants was always an art and a thing of beauty to me.  So it's weird to me that it took me 20 additional years before I took a stab at my long-lost green thumb.

If you are like me and live in an apartment with no yard, fear not!  You can always buy potting soil and seeds for cheap and plants herbs and leave the pots by your front door, in the shared back yard, your balcony or window sill, even on the roof if you have access!  If you can't afford pots, just use old tupperware containers (though being mindful that the plant will eventually outgrow that bucket.)  Also remember to poke holes at the bottom of the container so liquid can drain.

If you have a little more room to spare, or have some significantly large Tupperware containers, you can try planting other things like zucchini, carrots, cucumbers and tomatoes.  I recently stumbled upon this idea (see picture) and think it's brilliant! My mom has TONS of these old Rubbermaid bins from back when all us kids lived at home that she does absolutely nothing with.  Granted it will cost some money to purchase potting soil, but in the long run remember -- growing your own produce is the gift that keeps on giving! Drop a couple seeds in, give it some water, sun and a little TLC, and put ole' Mother Nature to work :)

4.  MEAT, POULTRY AND EGGS
When it comes to meat, you'll have to pick and choose your own battles here too.  My rule of thumb which helps is to stick with what's on sale and then make decisions that way.   Sometimes it's a matter of altering your recipes to accommodate seasonal or sale meats than the other way around.  Regardless, you're just always going to want to buy hormone-free, antibiotic-free, growth hormone (rBST)-free, grass-fed/cage-free/free range meats and eggs as often as possible.

The one big thing you can do to reduce this expense is to choose frozen over fresh meats.  While fresh meat is always ideal, if it's a matter of buying a frozen organic chicken breast versus a fresh "regular" (read: tampered with) one, go the frozen route.  Just make sure that no preservatives were used in the freezing process.  Frozen meats are usually always significantly cheaper than fresh since they store for longer, ship more easily, and require less of a rush from slaughter to sale.  One final note - egg whites can be expensive.  A carton of cage-free Trader Joe's egg whites is $2.99, and produces 10 3-tbsp servings.  Each 3 tbsp serving equates to one egg white.  Which means this carton only contains the equivalent of 10 eggs.  You can buy a dozen of Trader Joe's cage-free whole eggs for $2.99.  There are a variety of things to do with the yolk, including making a hair mask out of them, using them in other recipes, feeding them to your dogs to make their coats shiny, mixing them with water and fertilizing plants with them, yada yada yada.  So it's more economical to go with the dozen eggs than the carton of whites and come up with ways to use the yolk if you don't want to consume it!

Lastly, there are many mainstream organic meat providers like Organic Valley and Stonyfield Farm that offer coupons on their websites which is always a good thing.

5.  CELEBRATE MEATLESS MONDAYS :)
Another way to cut back on budget expenses and still eat clean, is to actually forgo a day of animal products.  Meat (especially the organic kind that we really should be consuming) is the most expensive item on anyone's list.  Even when you consume animal products that are in season, or produced in abundance for certain holidays (turkeys, hams, etc), that price still adds up.  Not all of us have a rifle and a forest or stream in our backyards to go collect our proteins ourselves, so Meatless Mondays is always a decent way to save a dime (my mom calls this Poor Man's Vegetarianism, haha).  Essentially, you trade out all of your meat items for non-meat proteins -- preferably, you buy a bag of kidney or black beans and cook them up at home ahead of time, and eat them instead. (Stay away from the canned varieties which can be tainted with BPA).

But there are other options.  Quinoa -- a great grain substitute -- is loaded with protein.  You can buy a box of Trader Joe's brand organic quinoa which yields enough to feed you for a whole week, for only $2.49.  Not to mention it can be added to just about any meal, including oatmeal, to boost protein content and improve food consistency and satiation.

6.  BUY IN BULK AND BEFRIEND THE ARCTIC!

Another major saver tip is buying in bulk and freezing what you don't immediately need to use.  And sometimes you don't even have to buy in bulk; sometimes just regular sales are too good to pass up!  Recently, Ralph's (Kroger) had a MASSIVE sale of Driscoll's organic raspberries.  They were selling entire pints of them for only $2.00.  The problem is, raspberries are extremely perishable, even when kept in the fridge.  So I bought up about 6 pints of those suckers, kept 2 in my fridge for mass [guiltless] consumption, and froze the rest.  Berries are delicate and don't thaw the way something like grapes or peach slices would, but that still doesn't mean they can't be used in any number of ways -- in your protein shakes, in baked goods you make... heck, I even just baked a pork tenderloin in half a bottle of leftover Charles Shaw "2-Buck Chuck" Cabernet with a 1/2 cup of those frozen berries and it made the most delightful raspberry-cab reduction sauce to go with the meat.  

The point of buying bulk is that, even though the price tag is higher, the per-unit cost is lower.  So hypothetically speaking, if you can afford $14.99 at Costco for a package of 15 frozen organic chicken breasts that will last you three weeks, that would be better than spending only $6.99 per bag for 5 breasts that will only last you 1 week, and end up costing you about $6 more than the price of the $15 bag at Costco in the long run. Another helpful trick with this tactic is to cook (or prepare) everything all at once, and then freeze the items.  That way, you can bypass repeated food prep chores, dirty dishes, etc.

7.  KNOW YOUR ECONOMIES OF SCALE
Along the topic of buying in bulk, another tip which I personally find to require the most time and attention but is REALLY helpful in the end  is to know your math.  Especially when you buy in bulk.  Sometimes, some deals aren't as appealing as they seem.  Other times, something might look like an excessive and extravagant purchase, but when you break it down by serving size, it becomes much more palatable (pun intended).  Case in point:  Shakeology.  Just about the healthiest protein shake you can find.  Problem?  One bag costs $120.  That's twice what I was used to paying for an entire week's worth of food!  BUT -- it provides one meal (one shake) a day for the whole month.  And we're talking a complete, WHOLESOME meal.  It breaks down to the following:

So, that's to say that that $120 bag actually provides an entire meal each day for you for less than a cup of your favorite coffee drink.  Economies of scale, people!

8.  BRANCH OUTSIDE OF YOUR RECIPES "COMFORT ZONE"
So you were raised being Butler'd caviar on a silver platter, eh?  Well, circumstances change, and so do your tastes.  But there are plenty of good substitutes for what you're used to, and when it comes to eating healthy on a dime, you may want to switch out your old Betty Crocker cook-book for something more -- how shall I say this, "flexible"? -- to the constraints of your wallet.

This really needs to be your best friend.

For me, I've found that a FANTASTIC way to eat healthy and clean on the cheap is to really embrace my inner-stew lover.  Stews, soups and chili are all hot, hearty, healthy and SUPER inexpensive to make organically.  Buy whatever produce is in season (particularly the varieties sold at the Farmer's Market) and make a stew in the crockpot.  Don't have a crockpot?  No worries, there are plenty of stew and soup recipes for just plan old soup pans on the stove:  Here's an example.

***************

So, obviously not an exhaustive list of tips and tricks (after all, I'm still learning these things as I go), and yes there are other money-saving ideas like using whole butter instead of olive oil in your cooking if you are able to be careful about portion controlling, but this is what I've come up with so far.

I would love to hear any ideas or tips you may have come up with to help save a dime on organic, clean eats.  Leave a comment! :)

Of Pilots and Precedent (secrets we can learn about dieting from lawmen and engineers)

Two days ago, NASA's prized Mars rover, "Curiosity", landed on the face of the red planet without a hitch. From an outsider's perspective, one might find oneself thinking, "Well, of course it went off without a hitch; these guys are rocket scientists, after all!"  But just because someone is a genius -- much like with any expert, academic or athletic or anywhere in between -- it by no means is a guarantee that enormous challenges will go flawlessly.

Give a look at this video to get the gist of what sort of hoops this one-ton intergalactic laboratory-on-wheels had to jump through in order to call the first stage of it's mission a "success":

From a dieting perspective, there is actually one major thing we can learn from Curiosity through this.  It's a secret that rocket scientists, engineers, and pilots of all kinds know very well:  The concept of the "autopilot" feature.  According to Wikipedia, in the times prior to the invention of autopiloting, "...aircraft required the continuous attention of a pilot in order to fly safely.  As aircraft range increased allowing flights of many hours, the constant attention led to serious fatigue.  An autopilot is designed to perform some of the tasks of the pilot."

"So how does this apply to my diet and training?" You wonder.  Well, I'll tell you.  Did you watch that video above?  So many complex measures to combat so many unpredictable variables with little-to-no room for error, and yet it went without a hitch.  Why?  AUTOPILOT.  There was no thought, no emotion, no psychology or pressure felt by that little rover's driver.  That's because it's driver was a non-thinking, non-breathing robot built to make decisions in lieu of a human being whose many qualities which MAKE them human - fear, anxiety, and fatigue among them - create an atmosphere of increased probability for failure.  Simply put, some of the most wonderful qualities which make us who and what we are, can simultaneously work against us when we are up against a strict challenge.

If it's one thing I've learned thus far in my dieting, it's that the best way to ensure as easy a journey as possible is to put your mind on autopilot.  Too tired to go to the gym?  Shut your mind off and go anyway.  Don't listen to your mind.  Craving sweets or being terribly tempted?  Turn off your mind.  Go onto autopilot.  Keep going about your business and do not allow yourself to think or dwell on or crave those items.  Summon your inner robot and quarantine your feelings and emotions; it's okay to have them, and to express them, but if you refine your autopilot feature properly, you will soon develop the ability to segregate your thoughts and feelings from practical tasks you simply must just accomplish regardless of how you feel.

Sounds easier than in practice, huh?  Well, that is true without a doubt.  Downloading and installing a mental autopilot is no easy feat, especially if you don't believe you possess the power.  But I have good news - there's an app for it ;)

In the world of common law, we have this concept known as "precedent".  Precedent is a rule established in a previous legal case that was fully researched, presented to a judge and jury, and decided upon.  Some of these cases produce new laws (think Roe v. Wade).  In other instances it is more a matter of interpretation, such as whether an unborn fetus is considered a murder victim if it's mother is killed, or if through a physical crime to the mother the fetus dies.  The point is, how these decisions are decided upon in legal cases absolutely affects future cases, because prosecutors and defendants alike can use the rulings to support or refute new legal matters on the grounds that these prior cases were fully researched, fully presented, and fully decided upon.  No need to go through the motions again when the work has already been done, right?  Precedent also helps to ensure consistency in law and rulings, as well as expediency of trials and predictability of outcomes.

To tie this all together, when you are first setting out to control your mind and develop a sort of mental autopilot to help you either avoid temptations or stick to fighting the good fight in your workouts, you'll find that you naturally will develop a system of precedent in the beginning stage.  The more you stay strong and overcome adverse desires,  the easier it will be the next time you find yourself in a similar situation.  Don't get me wrong, the temptations don't fully go away, and the fatigue or laziness or general lack of motivation will occasionally creep in and dissuade you from working out.  But I can guarantee you that the more you ignore those negative thoughts and just force yourself to do what you gotta do anyway, the sooner you will develop that little autopilot function which makes getting through the less glamorous times much more manageable.  You realize you will survive.  You realize that no, you won't die if you don't get a slice of that cake, that the temptation will go away, and you'll remember how good you felt when you avoided the temptation.  The more you stick to it, the better of a case you will develop and the larger a library of precedent you will have to draw upon with each subsequent trial you face.  Your discipline will become more routine, and the outcomes much more predictable.

I have a coworker who brings pizza into the office everyday, and that's where the inspiration for this post came from.  I realized as she was heating up her customary four (FOUR!!) pieces in the convection oven, that I would just as easily pick up a raw onion and eat it like an apple as I would eat a slice of that pizza.  I wasn't tempted by it at all.  5 months ago, 4 months ago, I wouldn't have been able to say the same.  My mind still errantly associated psychological satisfaction with the physical act of eating pizza.  The tastes, the smells, and the textures all screamed "EAT ME!!" when I saw pizza.  But over the course of 6 months I have said, "No!!" enough times to realize I'm strong enough and perfectly capable of not succumbing to temptation, and now it isn't just a matter of using autopilot to help me avoid caving in; now, I'm not even tempted by it at all!  Pizza has no hold over me :)

So, regardless of where you are in your journey, whether you're the NASA Curiosity rover about to enter it's "7 minutes of terror" or you're already starting to colonize Pluto, I suggest you view overcoming challenges in a new light.  Attacking things systematically is always best especially if you have a logical thought process to lean on when the emotions come flooding in.  If you can learn to develop a little more of a mechanical approach toward the things in your life so easily derailed by human error, who knows where you'll land???  And I imagine the view will be spectacular once you arrive :)

Back on the Horse

Well, it is the Olympics and I am sure everybody is fully engrossed in the spirit of athleticism at this point.  We expect greatness from these athletes - after all, they have been training for these events for how many years??? They are experts in their field, and thus we expect nothing short of pure gold from them!

But those kinds of expectations are unreasonable.  Even just having those expectations can be enough to set someone up for failure, due to no other factor than the sheer psychological pressure alone.  For the rest of us, when it comes to just our regular lives (and the goals and ambitions we set ourselves upon), I feel like we can sometimes sabotage ourselves in like fashion by putting unreasonable pressure on getting results, even when it's with the best of intentions.  As the saying goes, the road to hell is paved with them!

Now, I'm not saying we're going to hell, of course (although dietary cheats are considered a grave sin in my life at this point!).  But what I am saying, is that life can be like a pommel horse sometimes and not all of us will land gracefully each go around.  July was a bit of an "off month" for me; it started and ended just like this video:

But even though I am only 6 months into diet and training, I feel like in 6 years it will be just the same:  moments of highs, moments of lows, and in the end, just a merry-go-round of getting up and 'back on the horse' until I see the success I want.  After all, I do expect gold of myself.  I just need to be prepared to peel my face of the mat each time I fall in the process.

When it comes to falling off of the horse, there is strategy even in that.  Very often, when we find ourselves losing our grip, there are a couple options at our disposal to mitigate the damage (or at least to save a little face).  For me, when I saw myself falling face-first into a stress-induced cold/flu last week, I referenced some advice I gave just a few days beforehand.  I subscribe to a page on facebook called Fit Chicks and they posted the following question from a fellow subscriber seeking advice:

How many of us can't identify with this, right???  We've all been there.  I left my own two-cents in the comments section, as follows:

Yes I am aware that there is a typo - it should say *aren't, not 'are'!

Now, I want to take a quick minute to discuss over-training.  To be fair and honest, I have never allowed myself a one week break from training other than for illness or injury.  I have reached overtraining and burnout points MANY times in my life, but up until only just recently, I never really knew what overtraining was, or the signs and symptoms of it.  I viewed it only as laziness, which made me push harder (which undoubtedly resulted in illness or injury, and thus the break my body desperately needed).

I posted on my Fan Page the other day about going through month-long spells of insatiable hunger and lethargy, and month-long spells of diminished appetite and abounding energy.  I could never figure it out.  For years I tried to understand what was going on, and was convinced it had to do with hormones.  I have had my thyroid levels checked more times than probably someone who legitimately has a thyroid problem!  Always normal.  Always.  Well, it wasn't until I re-read this post and my ensuing response that it dawned on me -- my spells of lethargy and hunger had nothing to do with hormones; they were 100% overtraining.

Bodybuilding.com posted a great article (found HERE) that details overtraining on a summary-level.  Overtraining, at its very basic, is simply pushing the body physically (or also mentally / emotionally) to a point that is beyond what it can recover from.  But it's not resultant of a sprint - that is to say, we all have workouts that are of higher intensity than others.  Rather, it is an accumulation over time where the body simply just breaks down because it can't keep up.  Signs and symptoms range from sleep and appetite issues to chronic muscle pain and fatigue during workouts to moodiness, depression/anxiety, and elevated blood pressure / heart rates even while at rest.  Teh strain can also deplete the immune system, resulting in colds and flues one normally would have been able to fight off.

According to the article "The Real Dangers of Overtraining" by QualityHealth.com (article found HERE), the process of overtraining can be described as such:

"What happens when you overtrain?  The goal of progressive exercise is to stress muscles enough to make them stronger.  If muscles aren't allowed adequate recovery time though, they rebel with fatigue, pain and poor function.   Tendons and ligaments that are put through too many repetitions or exposed to too much weight become inflamed.  Not only is this painful, it can cause such serious injury that it can shut down an athlete's career.  For less serious athletes, it can result in weekend warrior-type injuries that reduce your enthusiasm and capacity for future exercise."

I posted my response to the Fit Chicks status update literally ONE DAY before I found myself in a dilemma with falling deeply into sickness.  The lethargy I was feeling the couple days prior had become unignorable.  I thought perhaps I had fallen victim to overtraining myself (after all, just a couple days before I had gone on a spontaneous 10 mile beach run which lasted 2 hours!).  I told myself I would rest Thursday and let myself eat whatever I wanted but by the time Thursday was over, it was clear that I was in the throes of a nasty illness.  So, I took my own advice.  Just as I had said, one week of a training / diet break wouldn't be enough to throw me off course.  So I embraced it.  I slept, I lounged, I guiltlessly rested.  The result?  I got a one week break to rest my muscles, recover my health, and do a CRUCIAL re-grouping before I start completely over with intensity anew.  I am so excited!

I also learned a lesson in all of this.  I no longer am going to fear overtraining, or beat myself up if I feel my body is begging for a break.  I am thinking about actually planning a full week of rest every other month as a way to recover and re-group before pushing again.  Treat it as a vacation, you know?  Catch up on sleep, catch up with old friends, maybe do some laundry???? Hahaha :)  I mean, I can't believe all the great things I got to do in the past week even while dying of illness.  I caught up on some reading, got to place some phone calls with out-of-country friends, it was really nice to not be rushing from gym to work to gym to errands to bed, wash-rinse-repeat.

But with that said.... I'm ready to get back on that horse and give it another whirl!  Happy Friday!

Forgive me Tosca Reno, for I have sinned.

"Ever tried?  Ever failed?  No matter.  Try again.  Fail again.  Fail better." -- Samuel Beckett

I love this quote.  I happened upon it while scouring the internets for absolution from a very stupid decision I made 100% out of habit, without realizing what I was doing until I realized what I was doing.

To me, this quote is honesty.  We all support one another with those glistening gems of encouragement that communicate the notion that only quitters quit and only those who endure will ever persevere.  Don't get me wrong, those quotes all hold their place in the bell curve of truth.  It's just that sometimes, realism is comforting.  And reality is that every good journey is one with flaws.  Besides -- how are we to say that we ever truly grew if we didn't find ourselves on the floor summoning an unknown strength to get back up and try again?

Well.  I have caught a HORRIFIC cold that is going around.  I noticed an unusual grogginess on Monday or Tuesday of last week and thought that perhaps I was overtrained.  I forced myself thru my workouts Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday, and then allowed myself to eat whatever I wanted (within reason) hoping that would replenish my energy stores so I could get back on the horse come Friday.

Didn't happen.

Instead, I found myself immediately spiraling downward into the onslaught of a vicious cold, the kind that for the first two days you feel like a space cadet and that your head and your body are two completely separate entities.  I remember sitting in traffic thinking that if we were invaded by space aliens I wouldn't even care one bit because I had no energy to.  The world could end and I would just fade away with it happily without putting up any bit of a fight, because I had none in me.

But I digress.  My sin was not in allowing myself to get so stressed to the point of immunological depletion; my sin was rather in how I handled it.

As a child, my mom fed us fairly healthily.  But as any loving parent might do, when we fell ill, she would do anything in her power to help us feel better.  And again, as any loving parent might do, with patience comes bodily healing, but in the meantime, how do you cheer a little one's spirits?  Simple pleasures.  Treats.  Renting movies, allowing video game time, that kind of thing.  Well for us, my mother would let us have fast foods, soda, food-related goodies.  I think a little bit of that also came from the fact that all of us kids were not big eaters when we got sick, and she wanted to encourage us to get food in our tummies.

Unfortunately, old habits die hard.  Anytime I get sick, I immediately shower myself with food.  Usually it's McDonald's, pizza, cookies and milk, ice cream…. anything that is normally off limits I suddenly set upon a silver platter and place before my face whether I want it or not.  And even worse, I've always held the subconscious belief that this was doing good,  that I was healing my ailing body by allowing myself these delectable pleasures.

Well, the good news is that in my recent bout of this recovery 'tactic', I never once even so much as entertained the thought of eating fast food, let alone crave it.  For me, it was more a matter of allowing myself some cheese and prosciutto at an Opening Ceremony gathering I went to (ok, and maybe a piece of chocolate cake), or buying a soy chai latte at Coffee Bean, or letting myself have Yogurtland or a glass of wine on Sunday night.  And to some extent, I believe the idea of relaxing from a strict diet and allowing the mind some pleasure can do a bit of good in physical healing.

But as I was driving home on Saturday night thinking about splurging on a Subway sandwich and a diet coke, it struck me:  why on earth would consuming crap food ever be a good idea when I am sick?

This should be the time when I eat the healthiest - when I put the healthiest foods into my body, to supply it with the purest nutrients available to help heal and recover.  After all, was it not Hippocrates who said "Let food be thy medicine, and medicine be thy food"?  And doesn't the old Chinese proverb go "He that takes medicine and neglects diet wastes the skill of the physician"?? Aren't all the old dead dudes always right????

In any event, I never feel guilty about a bad decision if enlightenment comes out of it.  Treats have their place and taking a step back from any strenuous exercise - be it physical or mental - is always necessary when you find yourself ill.  But it should only be taken so far.  The Gerson Therapy has proven with great success that proper nutrition can reverse all kinds of illness, supporting the idea that indulgences shouldn't go beyond a one-time gig.  

This month was supposed to be my last month (and most strict!) of leaning out before I started altering my diet to accommodate muscle growth.  My goal was to have shaved off all those last remaining pounds by, well, today.  Instead, I took a huge step back.  I let life get the best of me.  Juggling the stress of my current job, interviewing for new ones, organizing a fundraising tournament from the ground up, dealing with emotional loss and trying to push myself in my workouts just simply did me in.  I treated myself more than I'd like to admit at the Whole Foods food bar (healthy, but still not acceptable given that I really needed to be on top of my caloric intake), I drank 3 more glasses of wine on average per week than I should have (I really shouldn't have had ANY, to be honest!), I didn't stay on top of drinking my water and opted for coffees instead, and I admittedly was caving in and having a Peanut Butter Balance Bar each day mid-morning as nothing other than a treat.  I'm so ashamed!  

But alas, I have learned my lesson.  While 'feeding my cold', I never once felt bad because in some strange way I knew that while I would gain a couple pounds, it ironically might help break the plateau I felt I've been on for the past couple months.  And I knew the rest from the gym would help give my muscles time to recover and gear up.   But enough is enough.  It will be August 1 in two days, and I'm re-commiting myself to a strict clean-eating diet from here on out.  August will be the month I go back to the basics - track each glass of water I drink till I've met my quota, recalibrate my food journal to make sure I'm covering the bases, and while I may not workout till Thursday just to give my body time to heal, I will come back with a renewed sense of urgency.

As Samuel Beckett has reminded me, failure is inevitable.  And to say this is the last time I fail is a complete lie because if this were the last time, it could mean only one thing: that I chose to not try again.  The idea is that with each failure we learn something new so that when we fail again, we fail BETTER, and the damage isn't as bad.  Refinement thru trials is the only road to success, and each lesson we learn is one less flaw we have to trip us up.  As Antoine de Saint-Exupery so masterfully expressed:

So with that, I'm going to go have a bowl of homemade turkey and veggie soup with a dash or two of organic dill, a large glass of water, and will start tomorrow completely fresh with a clean slate as the new day dawns.

HALF YEAR ANNIVERSARY POST!! And progress photos, and other profundities.

I keep a piggy bank.  Well, more realistically, it's an empty protein powder can which I have converted into something useful anew.  Last night, I got a bout of OCD and decided to roll a bunch of the coins in there to scratch an "organization itch" I was having, and wouldn't you know, I had already put away $72 in change in only just a couple months!  Those nickels and dimes didn't even exist to me, they were nothing but little bits that I thought about on an individual basis.  One coin here, one coin there.  They were so minuscule that seeing beyond their individual values didn't even cross my mind.  It was more just an exercise to de-clutter my wallet than to actually save up any reasonable sum of money.

A lot of this got me into a spell of reflection.  Sometimes I feel like we treat a good portion of our life like we do loose change.  Minutes here, minutes there.  And the supply of time many of us have, much like with money, can seem comfortably abundant.  Perhaps even trivially insignificant.  We are careful about some expenditures, but for the most part we float through life like we sift through bills -- it's a routine that we just "do" with no purposeful appreciation.  And when it comes to forecasting into the future, so many of us are guilty of only focusing on the macro-issues and viewing life events like currency in our wallets; we think in terms of dollar bills without any regard for the change.

Something that has always fascinated me about life is starting a new journey and envisioning how it will all play out.  I used to do it at the beginning of the new school year... thinking about homecoming, football games.... what boys I'd be sitting next to in my new classes, what dreams may come true.  Envisioning how I'd look in my Prom dress, what shoes I'd wear with my golden graduation gown.  The parties, the new adventures.  I've done the same thing with new relationships, new jobs, and especially new years. But the fascinating part of it was always at the end, when I looked back and saw how NOTHING occurred the way I had envisioned.  Nothing transpired as quickly and effortlessly as I had forecast.  There was no magic, no fairytale explosion of lyrical happenstance; it rather was a lot of toil, patience, hard work and faith.  Also a lot of disappointment and shortcomings, because often times in waiting for the "magic" to happen, a path of inaction was elected instead.  And in the end, I would always see that the "magic" was never in how things fell into place.  It wasn't even in my determination to simply not let things fall apart.  The magic, rather, was in the growth.  The magic was looking back at where I started -- my empty wallet full of big ideas and purchases to be made -- and then seeing how it was the toil of day-to-day life, the earning of mere pennies on the dollar, that had contributed to the accumulation of wisdom which transformed me into a greater, more capable, more well-rounded and accomplished human being.  It was never the dollars or the big-ticket dreams that changed me.  Instead, it was all the loose change, the minutes that I never thought about and all of those passing moments in between the dreams and desires of macro-life that I collected in a tin can in the corner of my mind without a passing glance, that were the building blocks of my foundation.  They composed the scatter plot line connecting who I was to who I was becoming.

When I awoke this morning, I was checking my calendar for meetings when I noticed that today is July 20th.  It marks the ending of my 25th week of training and clean eating, and signifies that I am only 11 days away from celebrating my HALF-YEAR anniversary of starting this crazy lifestyle revolution!  And that's when my thoughts from the night prior really came full circle and sort of blew my mind in the quiet moments of the morning.  I have recently been looking back on my journey and can't believe how far I've come.  I had to put my head down and just keep fighting the current.  I refused to stop, I refused to let my mind tell me it couldn't be done.  This forced me to really live in the moment and take it one week, one day, sometimes even just one hour at a time.  And now, as I lift my head for a breath of air before I continue onto the second stage of fighting against the current, I've looked back at the shore where I started and can't believe how far from land I've come.  It was the change that had collected in my piggy bank - each hour I made it avoiding caving into treats, each individual squat, each single stride that took me farther from the start line and closer to the finish.  It was an accumulation of the moments I never thought about and that never seemed to really matter; it was each tiny struggle (which subsequently turned into each tiny victory) that made up the baby steps which led to the big things happening.  There was no magic nor a singular moment where I woke up and said, "HALLELUJAH! I lost 15 pounds over night!"  There was no point where it suddenly got easier.  It was more of a subtle adaptation and a certain strength of both body and mind that developed which made believing I could do it, easier.  The faith that I could do it and the determination to stick with it have become the pillars of my success thus far.

For the past few weeks I've been trying to figure out what to blog when it came to my 6-month mark.  It is a tremendous milestone for me, because I had never thought I would make it this far.  But from all of these thoughts that came to me this morning arose an inspiration of what to write.  So, instead of waiting 2 weeks to blog for my half-year anniversary, I'm going to do it now :)

Things That Training and Clean Eating Have Taught Me About Life In General

1. "I know one thing, that I know nothing." --Socrates 
   Before I set out on this mission, I thought I knew everything about fitness and nutrition.  In reality, however, I only knew 100% of what I thought I knew, or wanted to believe.  Looking back, I can say with a small degree of shame that deep down I knew I was misinformed and/or flat-out wrong.  But I was too confident in my own ignorance, too fearful of change, and too proud to accept that I had wasted countless years doing the wrong thing. 
   
   I find myself now so open to trying new things.  And doing them has become so easy for me.  The success that I've had at implementing change, whether it's been quitting dairy, cutting out fruit and store-bought protein bars, learning to do weights before cardio, or simply fighting off a temptation as it comes one hour at a time, has laid a foundational precedent for all the times that have followed when a challenge has arisen.  Simply put:  I've learned to never say "I can't" until I've walked a mile in those shoes...or however long it takes 'til I've proven that I CAN. :)
2. "Doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith is his twin brother." --Khalil Gibran
   Doubt?  I don't know if that word has a statute of limitations.  28 years of doubt had calcified into my heart a false truth, one that told me that making it this far was impossible.  But it wasn't just that it was impossible; it was entirely unreasonable, unsustainable, and unfathomable.   Never in my life have I sunk my teeth into something so steadfastly and refused to let go.  Never have I gripped onto something so tightly and held on for dear life, even when the pain and the trials amassed, for the sheer principal of one last chance to prove that I was not as conquerable as I had led myself to believe.
   
   I have accomplished a great many things with my diet and training.  Among other things, did you know I had never even used the oven before I started clean-eating?  I now make my own homemade protein bars, for crying out loud!  I've given up all processed food, and condiments that made healthy food "taste better".  I've given up soda, milk, juice and artificial sweeteners. I've pushed myself to impossible limits in my training, and literally do everything in reverse from what I used to do before.  I've beaten all my records and all my expectations, and I realize now that I have only just reached the tip of the iceberg of what I am capable of.
   
   These all may seem like insignificant feats, but they represent something far greater:  They represent the shell of doubt I have encased myself within for the last 28 years, crumbling all around me.  I am breaking free of all of the constraints I now realize I was placing on myself.  There's this sense of freedom, this empowerment that calls for blood now, and a reckoning for the countless chains I've shackled myself with - not just diet / fitness goals, but other things I've allowed myself to believe were out of my scope of capacity.  Educational endeavors, travel adventures and athletic pursuits I've been too timid to pursue...  I knew clean-eating would be a challenge, but I didn't realize how much I would learn about perseverance, will power, and the inner strength I am capable of harnessing.  For the first time in possibly forever, all those quotes about being able to achieve anything I put my mind too are no longer cliches; they are simply reminders of something I already know to be true.
3. "I always say if the marathon is a part-time interest, you will only get part-time results." --Bill Rodgers
   For any of you just starting out on this wild adventure, I'm going to tell you the cold hard truth right now about everything you need to know regarding clean eating and training in an effort to achieve your goals and dreams.
   
   Right now, you are standing at the starting line of a race that you may or may not have trained for, but it really doesn't matter because any concept of distance you currently have of it will not match up to the reality of the challenge before you.  Some of you are more well-equipped or prepared than others; some of you have had prior experience with this race, some of you may already consider yourselves experts on the course.  Others of you, however, may have tried it before and failed; even others may not even know the course at all.  Some of you are swimming in confidence, and know what will be required of you.  You say to yourself, "Self, it just is what it is.  I just gotta do what I need to do to get to the finish line", while others of you are drowning in fear of the challenge, your own self-doubts having prevented you from perhaps even approaching the starting line until just this moment.
   
   None of this matters.  It matters not how prepared or not you are, how many legs up you think you have on the competition, or what pace you tackle the race at.  You think pace is an indicator of future success??  Ask the tortoise and the hare that question.  It isn't about pace, it is about PERSEVERANCE.  You want to know the truth?  The truth is that it doesn't matter how disadvantaged you feel, or how tall the odds seem to be stacked.  The truth is that everyone is starting at the start line, and finishing at the finish line.  And any idea you have about how difficult it might be, or your awareness of the temptations and struggles you'll face and how much they will just suck, will not compare to the moment when you are fully immersed in said challenge and feel the crushing weight of keeping your eyes focused on the finish line and letting your desire to reach it supersede the enchantingly hypnotic voice of failure telling you to give up and give in.  The strong and the weak, the experienced and the inexperienced, the morbidly obese and the skinny fat folks alike, ALL face the SAME moments of pressure, of doubt, of exhaustion, of temptation and weakness and hardship.  This course is not easy FOR ANYONE.
   
   So stop making excuses for yourself.  When you are 10 miles into this race and feel like you have been going forever, and the humidity increases and you find yourself on a 8% incline hill and want to give up, thinking you can't possibly push harder or dig deeper, that life is demanding too much of you and you've fully lost sight of what this journey means to you in the face of immediate bodily or psychological pain, stop thinking.  Turn your ears off.  Turn your brain off.  Put the blinders up over your eyes, and let your body do the work.  There's a saying that goes, "The mind will give up a thousand times before the body does", and I can speak to you with 100% experience that nothing rings truer than this.  Your mind excels at telling you lies that most people won't even give their body a chance to refute.  And if you choose to cave in and not repeatedly give absolutely every ounce of blood, sweat and tears you have to this endeavor, you can expect nothing short of sub-par results, not to mention you will be cheating yourself out of the experience of a lifetime.

So.  Why all the doom and gloom on that last bullet point, you ask???  I'll tell you why (and this applies to ALL goals and dreams in life, not just those pertaining to diet and fitness):  If you are willing to move mountains - not just in a conceptual way, but actually push with a determination you've never known despite all the odds and all the naysayers, all in the heat of the battle when those challenges and temptations and exhaustion have settled upon you with a force you never foresaw when you first started out, I can guarantee you one thing:  You will change as a human being.  It is IMPOSSIBLE for you to take on this task, and not change as a human being.  Your experience of life and what you realize you are capable of is limitless, much like the universe.  If you chose to push beyond the limits you have placed on yourself, your growth as a human will expand infinitely.  And if you push against these mountains repeatedly, with complete devotion in a spirit that rivals Braveheart's on the Irish battlefields, your immediate goals will become secondary to the complete renaissance you will experience within you, and your experience of living and feeling truly alive will amplify to euphoric levels.  It may be quiet, and subtle.  You may feel it in the middle of an epic cardio session, or that last squat rep in your last set when the perfect song comes onto your iPod.  Or it may be more a matter of reflection when you look back and realize that you have transformed into something superhuman without ever even knowing it.

And you will see that it was never the mile markers along your race that mattered.  It wasn't even in the most memorable challenges that you had anticipated or battled against.  You'll notice that all the results you garnered, and on a bigger scale, the growth you have experienced as a person, were a direct product of each individual step you took along the way.  Yes, there will be detours.  Yes, you will slip and fall.  But those were already factored into the equation.  The magic wasn't ever in the sunk costs or anticipated victories; the magic was in each time you chose to put one foot in front of the other, instead of taking off your shoes and sitting down along the roadside.

So those are the more profound things I have learned so far in just this half year so far.  And I am BEYOND excited to see what the next 6 months have in store for me.  

Until then, a little progress report!!!

18 pounds and 6.6% body fat shed since the 3rd week of my program, when I did my first weigh-in.

Week 22

Week 23

End of Week 25

So.  Here's to adding up all the change, and looking forward to 6 more months of making small moments larger than life! :) <3